Wrote Charlie, though I know I should not have. I just wanted to let him know about LightSpeed. No opportunities there for him anymore. Speaking of good ol' LS, I went up there yesterday and the door was unlocked, so I had a look. They painted it yellow with green trim (yuck!) and got rid of all the partitions and desks (they are stacked in Randall's office) but other than that it looks the same as before. I even went into my old office. The kitchen is also pretty dismantled though I guess they are keeping the microwave.
I ran into the Grand Poobah in the elevator yesterday and he told me the sale of LS has not gone through, but they have someone interested in investing. NOOOO! NOOO! It's the same old stupid nightmare again!
Coming up is the first married Valentine's Day! I am keeping an eye out for a little gadget for Arthur. Might use one of the sex coupons.

Of course, the sheikh is here today, unlike other Fridays and freaks me out whenever I see him. Good thing he's wearing those squeaky shoes and I can hear him come from far away.

F#@^k! Once again I find out I had to do something after the fact. How the heck was I supposed to know that they use the title tag? And that I was supposed to update it? I feel like a big flake. And the sheikh explains everything to me in a calm voice like to a child. I feel all dysfunctional! Maybe I am special needs.

Yesterday afternoon Rodrigo came to my office to apologize for some dreamed up thing. He hoped he did not offend me by saying he had practiced saying a Polish name to impress me. As if, my friend! He worried that I thought he was being flippant and disrespectful. Now, OK, I am the last to notice these things, but all joking aside, I think that he might like me a bit.

It did not work, I went and talked to Rodrigo and Pablo. Pablo is married as well and is very sweet. The sheikh also came in and passed by. Danger, danger, danger.
Hm, this gives me an idea for a new book...

Blogging at work certainly has its challenges.
Major thing is that the package that came for Arthur is just software he ordered, not what I feared.
I must be the most impatient woman in the world. Once I decide something, I want it NOW. Arthur and I have been 'trying' for two months, which is a very short time, but I'm already wondering why it hasn't happened yet. My hormones are probably not even working normally yet, for God's sake and I am thinking up other possibilities like adoption and whatnot. I wonder if other women feel that way. The standard response is 'wait and relax and then it will happen'. Well, it's kinda hard to relax! I do hope I was not misguided enough to say that to another woman. Mind, the first time it was so easy. In fact, I fervently did not want it to happen and of course it did.
Must say hormones are doing strange things these days. Have been imagining the sheikh in the buff and liking the mental image. And I can hear Rodrigo's voice in the kitchen and am doing my best to not go there and be admired. I do think he likes me. This is why I have not responded to his offer of lunch yet. I can see danger lurking. If it was only as simple as with Randall. I think that is the purest friendship I have ever had.

A big day with the sheikh yesterday. He came into my office twice, dragged me to a meeting where it was absolutely obvious I was not needed. Then of course, I had the usual meeting with him in his office. In a very small way he reminds me of Randall. Randall used to insist I was involved with everything. He was so lovely. If he was not so totally platonic toward me, I would totally have fallen in love with him. But perhaps not. Even when he held my hands in his at the coffee shop that one time, I felt nothing but warmth and friendship. Mind, Barry had quite a face on when he saw it.

I have had a grump on for the last week about how little I belong here, how Chrissie and them stay in their room and hardly ever come out while I am all over the place, meeting people. Well, it came to me this morning that maybe I intimidate them. I can hardly believe anyone would be intimidated by me. I mean, doe eyes and everything. Most men think I am but a little woman lost in a big world. How can that be intimidating? Well, but that's men for you. Luckily Arthur does not act this way. Anyway, maybe that's it.

Had a fab time with Emma on the weekend. She is so great! Coming back we had a bit of a road cone incident. We howled with laughter! Suffice it to say, there is now an orange road cone behind my building. It doubled as the snowman's hat for a while, but I think the children were not amused! :)

A strange day at work yesterday. Lots of shuffles at the top. People now report to other people and some rather less than happy faces were to be seen, the most noticeable to me of which was my boss, the Sheik. Perhaps though he is only upset because John John is leaving. It will be a relief not to have John John checking up on everyone first thing in the morning.

It all put me in a very restless mood, very decided to look elsewhere for employment. I'm afraid turning tricks on the street is not an option in this cold, so it will have to be something much less lucrative. But hopefully no less exciting.

I thought about blogging a bit and have to confess that I am fascinated by the fact that people are willing to let others read their diaries. Not only willing, but hopeful that others will read it. A bit of a sad commentary on our times, I think. The other interesting part is that people actually WANT to read others' scribblings. What is it about a diary or journal that makes it so interesting? I am drawn to read other blogs too. Don't think that I'm immune! And after all, there is a reason why I made this a public blog rather than a private one!

I need a new job. I have done nothing original in a year and that's bad. Ever since I started here, I have been doing nothing but updates of other people's documents and then on review, it turns out that the updates may be correct, but the other people's stuff is not and I get the blame. F#$#^k it! It's time to go. OK, OK, if I got a huge raise, I might stay, but as my meager salary according to HR is market value, that does not seem likely.

Also, I work with people who do not talk. Not that I am the world's biggest talker. They just sit there at their desks. The only time I found out anything about Chrissie or Jon was at the Christmas lunch, after they had a glass of wine. Oh, yeah, and Chrissie and Jon go for coffee together always. Their desks are located about ten feet away from the coffee machine, I might add, but they clearly need each other's support as they navigate the treacherous hall area. My private opinion is that they're doing it. At least I think she wants to. Can't think why, maybe it's to stroke that peach fuzz he calls hair.

I've been here for seven months and I still feel like I don't fit in. OK, so I'm having a moan. It's my blog and I'll cry if I want to. I better write a bestseller soon so I can get out of here!!!!

I am back to my red/blonde self after an intense session at the salon yesterday. Whew! It feels good. Arthur liked it and thought it was sexy. Wait til he sees what I have in store tonight!
Feels like I dropped another pound or two by the way the pants sit on my thighs today. Not to worry though, I'm sure they'll be back by the end of the day. How is it that one is thinner in the mornings? Is it because we don't eat at night? Does this mean that anorexics were right all along?
Bloody stupid government posted a delay in processing papers of 216 days! What the heck is that? Does anyone work there at all? How can I get a job at a place that says oh, yes, we'll deliver a product to you, but it will be 216 days late? And that's OK with everyone! It's expected! Maybe next time I'm supposed to deliver a document, I'll put together a website and ask people to check in on it so they can see what kind of delay they're looking at. Aaarrrggghhhh!

Oops, I see I already wrote about what Charlie said. I must be obsessing about it. Would not be the first time.
The ten pounds gained over the holidays is only seven pounds now, but that means I can't have any choccy and I WANT it I NEED it! This sux!

Having day full of doubt. Started second novel and am absolutely convinced that it's a worthless piece of crap. Who can read such drivel?
Parents came on the weekend and of course mom insisted on speaking Polish to all and sundry. Poor Arthur. I know well how he feels. He bore it well though.
It's such a grey day outside. I almost didn't want to put on my new boots because it's so snowy. Then remembered that this is why I bought them.
I keep thinking about something the African said (OK, from now on he'll be known as Charlie, I can't keep writing the African all the time). Charlie said he had a good time with me. Hah! High time to say it. Now that the relationship is over, he tells me! I suppose that's because now it's safe. Men are so weird.

Today should be a day of inventing new metaphors for the cold. It's colder than an Alberta meatlocker. No, wait, that might not be true. Snicker.
My eyeballs actually felt cold on the way from the bus to the building. Nassty weather. And yet it looks so sunny and benign out there.
It comes to me that I may have to begin inventing things to write about. Everyday life is well... everyday. I do not receive visits from old love interests daily. Nor presents from would be admirers either. Those chocolate cookies were yummy btw. Arthur loved them. I had a couple as well since I adore shortbread, but as the Christmas ten pounds is taking its time in coming off, I did not have that many.
Well then. My visit to Paris last night was quite nice. I stayed in a small hotel near the place de Vogues. I just love that area. It feels like something out of "Notre Dame de Paris", possibly because it is so near Notre Dame. Arthur and I took a walk by the Seine and had a nice dinner in the Quartier Latin. Why is it that wine tastes better in France? A quick stop at the Galleries Lafayette before dashing back to the airport this morning. I didn't really buy anything, well just a bottle of perfume, just to say I got something in Paris.
Sitting at my desk at work is quite mundane now.

I cannot believe that I forgot the password to the other one. Ah, well, no matter.

The African came to see me on Tuesday. I was rather shocked. I have not seen him in two years. And here he pops up out of the blue. Heart flutter going up to reception to see him, but then pretty much OK. It certainly was not like in the past when I just could not keep my hands off him. He gave me a peck on the cheek. We went down for coffee. I think it was a cheer up visit for him. It was a fall back visit. He brought up our TTC trips way back when. He said he had a good time. So did I, mate. Too bad you were so bloody cold.
All in all, this confirmed the fact that Arthur was a good choice for me. Though he has already managed to get my mother all in a huff.

Then yesterday, Rodrigo came into my office, bearing a parcel and with a bit of a goofy grin took out a little package for me. I have not had such attention from men when I was single! Well, maybe that's it. Anyway, Rodrigo I think wanted to hug me, but I didn't. It's work after all.